I guess time doesnt heal

Forum rules
Please consider replying to an existing message. It only takes a minute and you may help someone else in need. A simple word of encouragement goes a long way.

Post a reply

This question is a means of preventing automated form submissions by spambots.
:D :) :( :o :shock: :? 8) :lol: :x :P :oops: :cry: :evil: :twisted: :roll: :wink: :!: :?: :idea: :arrow: :| :mrgreen:
BBCode is OFF
Smilies are ON
Topic review

Expand view Topic review: I guess time doesnt heal

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by jesus4life » Tue May 17, 2011 11:58 pm

Mmm coffee sounds good :) , however I am not God. I'm just Jen. I have not come to judge your post, as I am a believer, but to send you a word of encouragement to keep up your sobriety. I myself am brand new here and I was led to this post as my first check in experience here. I am only one day sober unplanned. I feel very out of control and depressed and I only know how to cope with my loneliness and everything else I believe in or don't believe in is with drinking. I have a faith but I as well question why God just seems not to answer my prayers because I have sleep anxiety and bad dreams and I pray and it sometimes turns out worse. But something tells me that I gotta press into my faith even harder. I think God keeps allowing for all of this to happen to get me to quit drinking and stay tuned into the Holy Spirit. I dunno, I'm sorry I did not mean to come in and preach. I am not bible thumper at all. i don't even go to church. I just wanted to uplift you somehow someway. May your life feel more in control soon. Namaste

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by newbie2 » Sun Feb 27, 2011 7:31 pm

Hey Joe,
Just wanted to check in and see how your holiday weekend went. Sorry to hear about your wife not being supportive of your sobriety. At least my S.O. does not offer me beers. But she does keep alcohol hidden in the house I recently found out. Ticks me off a bit, but the stashing is her issue, not mine. Obviously she has issues with alcohol, too. I told her to just please not drink in front of me. Too tempting. As to your wife's views of A.A., she almost sounds as if she may have twisted what the counselor said to fit what she wanted to hear....Either that or just a terrible (!) counselor. Anyway, we know it is helping you, so that is what matters. Keep up the good work. And it is work--that we both know. Regards, Newbie2

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by Hoot Hooten » Wed Sep 09, 2009 10:17 am

It took me months of "one months" to finally get a month. Now you know why we have those silly signs at the meetings that say, "Easy Does It." "KISS" and "One Day at a Time." My sponsor told me, "Give me 90 meetings in 90 days, then I'll let you know if things are going to work out for us." I was just like you. Angry, frustrated - beat.

I don't know about you, but for me there was a continuous rage coursing it's way through my being. That voice you're hearing is the alcoholic that's saying, "Aw to hell with it, you might as well drink if you're going to have to put up with this shit..!"

Take it easy on yourself my friend. Just "keep coming back," and you too will begin to enjoy sober life. As far as trying to interpret the Bible, relax on that for now. Saving your soul is important, but we come to AA to save our asses. Oh, by the way, after many years, I had a spiritual awakening that literally blew my mind. God showed up 12 years ago, and I haven't had a drink, joint, toot or anything else since. Remind me to tell you that story some day.

All my best my friend,

Claude "Hoot" Hooten
Orcutt, CA

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by John » Mon Sep 07, 2009 10:37 pm

Wayneo88@yahoo.com wrote:My name is Jennifer, I am Wayne's wife. He is gone...thank you for your support. I just found this page while looking through his computer.

Wayne or Jennifer... any news?

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by joep54321 » Fri Sep 04, 2009 11:38 am

glad to hear that you were able to over come the urge STAY STRONG one day at a time. My spouse is not supportive either. She is a drinker herself. Last week she must have asked me 3 times after she was half in the bag if I was still good or if I wanted a beer. She also thinks AA is some kind of a cult. She spoke to a addict counsler who I think does not know her ass from a hole in the ground and she told her that people with addictive personalities go from being addicted to alcoho; and drugs to being addicted to AA meetings which then take over their life. Its never easy/ Well the weekend is here unfortunately its a long holiday weekend which is my toughest time of all but I am going to take 1 day at a time and stay sober. Have a nice sober holiday.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by newbie2 » Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:22 pm

Hi Joep,
So glad to see your post today. I had a helluva day and really felt like going out for a six pack or a bottle of something, but I didn't, and my spouse is not being as supportive as could be, which sucks. You are right about all the shit life throwing you/us being clearer without alcohol. Life does that a lot. We are just, for our own personal reasons, learning how to deal with that shit that has been there all along. When we were drinking we weren't dealing with the shit, just dulling the pain and creating more shit for ourselves in the meantime. As for the panic and anxiety, have you thought about prescribed medication? It can take the edge off. Keep the faith. Chat soon.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by joep54321 » Wed Sep 02, 2009 3:46 pm

thanks for the post. I have 17 days as of today. The only problem is, for as good and better as I feel , life just keeps throwing more and more shit at me and when your sober all of a sudden everything is a reality. I am just starting to experience alot of panic and anxiety now that I see the whole world and whats going on alot clearer. I can't hide behind the everything looks good lense of the bottom of an empty bottle of booze. I am trying to hit meetings on a daily basis and share,. it seems to take away the pain if even for a moment.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by newbie2 » Tue Sep 01, 2009 11:03 pm

Congrats on the time you have and your first sober weekend. It's all relative. I was able to go to see my psychiatrist today and tell her I haven't had a drink in a month. That was a good feeling. And my mood is improving. If you can, try and remind yourself that the bad feelings pass. And try and take it moment by moment if you can. Sometimes even one day at a time is too long. Eventually, there's gotta be some room made for some good feelings. Hang in there and thanks for the words of encouragement. You helped me a lot by sharing.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by joep54321 » Mon Aug 24, 2009 8:09 am

Hey Newbie,
I am new also only about 1 month. I have not been sober the whole month but I am working in it. I have 8 days as of today Monday 8-24 -09 and this is the first weekend in 30 yrs that I did not pick up a drink. I think like you and Wayne at times also but then I realize that drinking is not going to make anything better. It's not going to help my DUI case. It's not going to help my finances, only put me more in depth from buying booze. It will not help my job situation, i need to stay focused. It will not help my family situation. Who wants to be around a drunk. Believe me I think like wayne did at times also but then I try and take a deep breath. As I am trying every day to hang in and not do anything stupid you do the same.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by newbie2 » Sun Aug 23, 2009 12:28 am

OMG, this is so depressing. I thought Wayne was depressed when I read his post. And that's what killed him. He's probably been drinking to dampen those feelings for all those years. I feel so bad for him and his family, especially Jennifer.

Is this what we have to look forward to? All of those feelings of depression gaining strength like a tornado building to a devastating ending? That is what I have been going through lately. If so, being sober is not all it is cracked up to be. But then again, neither was living drunk. So what is the answer?....For me, I am clinging to psychotherapy and antidepressants, which work much better now that I'm not drinking. They don't take away all the pain, but maybe that's what I need to learn to deal with bettter. Again, my heart goes out to you, Jennifer.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by joep54321 » Tue Aug 18, 2009 10:08 pm

Oh my god Jennifer I am so sorry. My prayers are with you>

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by Wayneo88@yahoo.com » Tue Aug 18, 2009 10:50 am

My name is Jennifer, I am Wayne's wife. He is gone...thank you for your support. I just found this page while looking through his computer.

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by Guest » Sun Aug 16, 2009 8:36 am

Hey man, relapsing is also part of the process, and it's okay. The only thing is you have to get back up again, and again, and again.

There's a great video on youtube that you may want to watch. The guy's name is Nick Vujicic, it's a story of courage and determination. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rC08lftikK0

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by joep54321 » Sat Aug 15, 2009 9:13 am

Hey Guest,
You are right. I screwed up last night and ended up getting smashed. I didn't see god sitting there pooring me drinks. I did it all by myself. I am to blame no one else. I hate feeling the way I do today and the things I remember doing and not remember doing last night. I am going to attack this demon of mine once again with a fresh start. Its the depression thing that is really killing me inside. I went from having the world by the balls about 8 years ago to having nothing now. I lost my wife and daughter 8 years ago. and I am in the process of losing everything fininacially at this point in time. this is where it gets hard.....

Re: I guess time doesnt heal

Post by Guest » Sat Aug 15, 2009 5:15 am

I'm with John on that point. Come on guys, do you really think it's gonna get better after going to meeting for 2 weeks? Everything takes time. How long have you been drinking? It's like a diet. People have put on weight for 20 years, they go on a diet and they want to lose it all in a month. it doesn't work that way, whether God exists or not.

And talking about God, what does he/she has to do with this? You're in control of your own life. If you decide to get drunk, it's your decision. I don't see God in that process. It's called FREE WILL and you can screw up as much as you want and then you can also blame God for Poor You because "God is mean and cruel". But why have the courage to take responsibility for your own actions when when it's easier to blame it on God or society or your spouse. Wake up guys.