by Guest » Sun Feb 27, 2011 7:27 pm
Have you made it back to the rooms yet? I'm so glad your first experience was a good one. I just got my first sponsor ever last night at a meeting in Hulmeville(lower bucks county). It has taken me 2 years to stop sponsoring myself, throw up my hands and let someone else help me. I have always been on the fence whether I should choose NA, CA or AA. Only because I am an addict and an alcoholic. But I found that the strongest foundation for me is AA and it seems like people have more clean time and the step work is a little more intense. That's just my opinion. No matter what, keep showing up. I decided that I can't let my own messed up mind run my life any more, and I have to turn my will over to someone else and some higher power......whatever that may be....I'll find out. I've also realized that these people in the rooms with clean time are so happy with life. They don't have anger and fear, there not self loathing and filled with resentment like I am. They are at peace with themselves. That's where everyone needs to be....addict or non addict. I'm sick of looking back at my past and crying about all the damage I've caused. I want to move on with my life. I know I dropped out of college, ran up credit card debt and still owe 10's of thousands of dollars in fines and lawyer fees. I've loss major Pharmaceutical jobs because of my addiction and now I make pennies compared to what I used to make. But I need to move on and be contempt with where I'm at. I have a second chance at life and i just have to do it this time. No matter which way it takes me. Without the rooms, I would not have this positive thinking in my head. Good luck to you and I hope you can stick with it. Who knows, maybe I'll run in to you one day at a retreat or a dance or some kind of service commitment. Wouldn't that be something. Hang in there and just surrender yourself now. Again.....Good luck and I know you can do it.
Have you made it back to the rooms yet? I'm so glad your first experience was a good one. I just got my first sponsor ever last night at a meeting in Hulmeville(lower bucks county). It has taken me 2 years to stop sponsoring myself, throw up my hands and let someone else help me. I have always been on the fence whether I should choose NA, CA or AA. Only because I am an addict and an alcoholic. But I found that the strongest foundation for me is AA and it seems like people have more clean time and the step work is a little more intense. That's just my opinion. No matter what, keep showing up. I decided that I can't let my own messed up mind run my life any more, and I have to turn my will over to someone else and some higher power......whatever that may be....I'll find out. I've also realized that these people in the rooms with clean time are so happy with life. They don't have anger and fear, there not self loathing and filled with resentment like I am. They are at peace with themselves. That's where everyone needs to be....addict or non addict. I'm sick of looking back at my past and crying about all the damage I've caused. I want to move on with my life. I know I dropped out of college, ran up credit card debt and still owe 10's of thousands of dollars in fines and lawyer fees. I've loss major Pharmaceutical jobs because of my addiction and now I make pennies compared to what I used to make. But I need to move on and be contempt with where I'm at. I have a second chance at life and i just have to do it this time. No matter which way it takes me. Without the rooms, I would not have this positive thinking in my head. Good luck to you and I hope you can stick with it. Who knows, maybe I'll run in to you one day at a retreat or a dance or some kind of service commitment. Wouldn't that be something. Hang in there and just surrender yourself now. Again.....Good luck and I know you can do it.