Paralysed with fear!

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Paralysed with fear!

Unread postby fiskbo1 » Wed Feb 09, 2011 6:10 pm

I know I have a problem with alcohol. I lost my license (for the third time) and then my job over my alcoholism. I quit drinking back in September. My problem is that since I quit drinking I have progressively felt depressed and worthless. I have not worked in 4 months. I guess that fortunately I have no wife or children. My problem is through the course of 30 plus years of drinking, I have managed to push all my family and friends out of my life. Does anybody out there have any suggestions on how I can overcome my fears and jumpstart myself to get my life in order. Lost at the Jersey Shore.
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Re: Paralysed with fear!

Unread postby DEEPDARKWATERS » Sun Feb 13, 2011 1:40 pm

Feeling depressed and worthless is more of a not working problem rather then not drinking problem ! I have been right where you are now, I lost my D/L for 10 years on my 3rd offence, but hung on to my job (just barely) by reaching out to others to get rides to and from work ! Swallowed my (false) pride & just begged anyone & everyone to get to work & MORE importantly to get to AA meetings after work ! I had just gone though a divorce with my actively drinking & drugging wife & had full custody of my infant first born son ! I was blessed with an understanding Mother who would look after him while I was at work, but she was smart enough to draw the line at that ! So, there I was, sitting in the front row at AA meeting's every night (yes, 7 days a week) with my son in my arms ! Oh. did I mention that he was born with S.I.D.'s & had to be hand monitored whenever he was asleep away from his electronic monitor at home ? He would just stop breathing & needed to be awakened before he passed on ! I can go on about how much stress I was dealing with when I hit bottom & stopped drinking but I think you get the idea ! Feb 14, 1984, I had my last drink & never had another ! I'm 54 yr's old now & have another son who lives full time with my first son & I (yep, divorced again & really had my heart ripped apart with that one). I was injured at work & I'm permanently disabled, my loving Mother passed away from cancer (very suddenly) & many other things that some would say were excuses to pick up a drink ! Don't hang with folks such as them ! There are no excuses to pick up a drink after you have admitted your problem ! Short & sweet of it, ONE DAY AT A TIME (sometimes a minute at a time) DON'T PICK IT UP (if you don't put it in your hand you can't drink it) & GO TO MEETING'S (where you will find the rest of your keep it simple guidance) ! Hope you work it as hard as I did & get your life back (hitting your knees never hurts & your higher power is YOUR higher power) !
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Re: Paralysed with fear!

Unread postby DEEPDARKWATERS » Sun Feb 13, 2011 2:07 pm

Feeling depressed and worthless is more of a not working problem rather then a not drinking problem ! I have been right where you are now, I lost my D/L for 10 years on my 3rd offence, but hung on to my job (just barely) by reaching out to others to get rides to and from work ! Swallowed my (false) pride & just begged anyone & everyone to get to work & MORE importantly to get to AA meetings after work ! I had just gone though a divorce with my actively drinking & drugging wife & had full custody of my infant first born son ! I was blessed with an understanding Mother who would look after him while I was at work, but she was smart enough to draw the line at that ! So, there I was, sitting in the front row at AA meeting's every night (yes, 7 days a week) with my son in my arms ! Oh. did I mention that he was born with S.I.D.'s & had to be hand monitored whenever he was asleep away from his electronic monitor at home ? He would just stop breathing & needed to be awakened before he passed on ! I can go on about how much stress I was dealing with when I hit bottom & stopped drinking but I think you get the idea ! Feb 14, 1984, I had my last drink & never had another ! I'm 54 yr's old now & have another son who lives full time with my first son & I (yep, divorced again & really had my heart ripped apart with that one). I was injured at work & I'm permanently disabled, my loving Mother passed away from cancer (very suddenly) & many other things that some would say were excuses to pick up a drink ! Don't hang with folks such as them ! There are no excuses to pick up a drink after you have admitted your problem ! Short & sweet of it, ONE DAY AT A TIME (sometimes a minute at a time) DON'T PICK IT UP (if you don't put it in your hand you can't drink it) & GO TO MEETING'S (where you will find the rest of your keep it simple guidance) ! Hope you work it as hard as I did & get your life back (hitting your knees never hurts & your higher power is YOUR higher power) ! As far as your fear goes, stuff it in a bag and bring it with you to a meeting, just walk in the door & blurt out- I'm (your first name here) and I need help ! The rest will fall into place & you will see your fear was false fear ! Good luck on your new journey to a better way to live (not aways easy but most definitely better) !
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Re: Paralysed with fear!

Unread postby Rainspa » Thu May 19, 2011 8:01 am

Does anybody out there have any suggestions on how I can overcome my fears and jumpstart myself to get my life in order. Lost at the Jersey Shore.

Yes, I have a suggestion.

It is simplistic but it will work:
Go to meetings
Work (and this is the important part) ALL of the 12 Steps of AA. (Do them in order, as written in the book "Alcoholics Anonymous"

It will address your fears and you will get your life in order.
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Re: Paralysed with fear!

Unread postby allims83 » Fri Jun 24, 2011 3:36 pm

First, you must understand that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I am early into my recovery so the feeling of paralysis due to fear and anxiety is still very fresh. I hope that you have utilized the program and started working it so that you break the chains that fear binds us in. The way you felt is in fact, very normal. I remember last week I said to my sponsor, "I am just so afraid of other people and what they think of me. I makes me want to isolate." She said, "Just about every other person in AA feels or has felt the same exact way."

Go to meetings. Get a sponsor. Put yourself out there, you need to be willing to be vulnerable. Ask for help. Most importantly, stop thinking and listen to what they tell you to do. It works. There is a better life out there for you, but you need to be willing to go get it.
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Re: Paralysed with fear!

Unread postby irish » Wed Jul 27, 2011 5:41 pm

Fiskbo #1 go to your doctor about your depession #2 attend meetings.# pray to your higher power. I was in the same boat 30. yrs. of drinking 75 days now and havent had a beer. I wish you luck. Take care my friend. by the way where at the shore are you? im down there quite often. Irish
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