going crazy

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Re: going crazy

Unread postby Guest » Mon Dec 21, 2015 6:24 pm

I've been "sober" for a year and 5 months. 90% of that time I've been doubting that I'm an alcoholic. Hoping that I may be because I'm constantly and crazily in my own head. Am I just nuts? No, I'm an alcoholic. Took many meetings, listening, occasional sharing, speaking, service, but mostly listening to finally accept the fact. I can really relate to the mental suffering I hear from others that share. My problem was that I was I comparing their physical, material,marital, and even spiritual problems to my own. I wasn't as bad as those people! but the mental anguish they expressed is usually spot on to mine. Today I still bounce around in my head that maybe I'm just mentally succumbing to this cult I've been going to for all this time; yes, More mind racing for me! For me, I just have to accept that I don't know what's in store for me, what I think I know. It is the higher power they talk about which is the game changer for me, if I could only except Him fully. I'm too intelligent for this higher power nonsense! That's more self feeding bullshit, but my head wants to believe it! It's hard to argue that since I stopped drinking,drugs my life has improved beyond what I thought possible. Is it the Lord? I hope so and even starting to think so. I don't know, but it's happening. I've started the steps over since I didn't, in my mind, do step 4 properly. That's where I am today, doing my personal inventory. I'm still crazy in the way I think of things, but I know I can lean on this higher power to show me the way. Still sounds nuts to me! But it's been working for me, when I choose to use Him. I'm hoping I come to a better understanding this conscious contact with God, because I feel it's in Him that I will find what I really need.
Guest
 

Re: going crazy

Unread postby Guest » Mon Dec 21, 2015 6:24 pm

I've been "sober" for a year and 5 months. 90% of that time I've been doubting that I'm an alcoholic. Hoping that I may be because I'm constantly and crazily in my own head. Am I just nuts? No, I'm an alcoholic. Took many meetings, listening, occasional sharing, speaking, service, but mostly listening to finally accept the fact. I can really relate to the mental suffering I hear from others that share. My problem was that I was I comparing their physical, material,marital, and even spiritual problems to my own. I wasn't as bad as those people! but the mental anguish they expressed is usually spot on to mine. Today I still bounce around in my head that maybe I'm just mentally succumbing to this cult I've been going to for all this time; yes, More mind racing for me! For me, I just have to accept that I don't know what's in store for me, what I think I know. It is the higher power they talk about which is the game changer for me, if I could only except Him fully. I'm too intelligent for this higher power nonsense! That's more self feeding bullshit, but my head wants to believe it! It's hard to argue that since I stopped drinking,drugs my life has improved beyond what I thought possible. Is it the Lord? I hope so and even starting to think so. I don't know, but it's happening. I've started the steps over since I didn't, in my mind, do step 4 properly. That's where I am today, doing my personal inventory. I'm still crazy in the way I think of things, but I know I can lean on this higher power to show me the way. Still sounds nuts to me! But it's been working for me, when I choose to use Him. I'm hoping I come to a better understanding this conscious contact with God, because I feel it's in Him that I will find what I really need.
Guest
 

Re: going crazy

Unread postby babs » Sat Jan 02, 2016 4:20 am

Hi , Im new to online soberity. I need help !?
babs
 

Re: going crazy

Unread postby Dely08094 » Sat Jan 02, 2016 9:46 pm

I am new also definitely an alcoholic three days without alcohol thinking about attending some meetings to help me stay determined not to drink.
Dely08094
 

Just Realizing what I am doing to my life

Unread postby cmmmf60 » Mon Mar 07, 2016 2:38 pm

Hi.... I am a newby too. I say to myself...oh you can have those 3 beers which ends up being 7.. I haven't moved into hard licquor but I find I drink wine... which makes me mean. I need a change and I need help.
cmmmf60
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Re: going crazy

Unread postby cmmmf60 » Fri Mar 11, 2016 4:32 pm

Dely08094 wrote:
> I am new also definitely an alcoholic three days without alcohol thinking
> about attending some meetings to help me stay determined not to drink.
Hi Dely08094... I just attended my 1st AA meeting. Very interesting and scary. I'm 5 days w/o drinking. Don't give up, Go to a meeting anywhere you'll either like it or walk out. Remember, it's your choice to drink. Good Luck :)
cmmmf60
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Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2016 12:47 pm

Re: going crazy

Unread postby emack » Tue Mar 15, 2016 3:35 pm

stay busy and think of were you want to be in your life.focus on your goals and dreams.you will be amazed how clear you can see living a sober life
emack
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Posts: 537
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Re: going crazy

Unread postby michellegoodrich505 » Tue Apr 05, 2016 11:54 am

I feel like I'mgoing crazy to!!
michellegoodrich505
 

Re: going crazy

Unread postby michellegoodrich505 » Tue Apr 05, 2016 12:08 pm

ME2 wrote:
> BEDBOUND WHEELCHAIR 26 YRS SOBER AND WANTS TO MAKE 27,I DONT LIKE TOPICS
> LISTS BUT LOVE CHAT INTERACT. HAVENT BEEN TO MEETING IN A MONTH.THERE I
> SAID IT.IS THERE EVER A REAL CHAT ONLINE WITH PEOPLE IN IT.


Hi there I'm so sorry that you are going through this! I was just sitting here feeling sorry for myself I relapsed after 4 and a half years in November! I almost died twice fell down stairs, wrecked my car into a pole got a DUI and then when I was sober broke my ankle and had to have surgury! so,,, i"m off my feet!!

What happened to you and 26 years is awesome!!
michellegoodrich505
 

Re: going crazy

Unread postby emack » Tue Apr 19, 2016 10:02 am

those thoughts"am I crazy " and "this can't be me",remember them because they are true.yes we are all crazy once the alcohol or drugs takes over.yes it is you but its you in total denial.this will all be much clearer if you give yourself a chance
and surrender to the problem.this will help with the inner struggles also.i wish I could offer you a quick fix but as you know there is not one.i will tell you this,if you are willing to really help yourself and your way of life then stay positive,think positive and get all the reinforcements you can like meeting,online,prayer or any of the other means that are out there.listen to what you hear from peeps who are willing to help.
emack
Registered User
 
Posts: 537
Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2014 11:47 am

Re: going crazy

Unread postby fosterd2323 » Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:40 pm

Anyone out there can help me
fosterd2323
 

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