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Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Mon Mar 16, 2009 6:12 pm
by sweetpea
I'm very new to this. Tonight I'll be going to my first meeting and I'm really nervous. I'm not an alcoholic in the sense that I drink everyday. But when I do go out with my friends and start drinking, I don't know when to stop and it gets out of hand. I tried to stop on my own. And I did okay for a little while, but the other night I went to a party and I feel like I destoyed everything I worked so hard for. I realized that I can't do this alone and I'm not going to get any support from my friends. (They don't seem to see this as a problem). I'm 28 but with no kids and a lot of single friends, I tend to act a lot younger than I am. I think this is why I never really saw it as much of a big deal until now, but I'm ready to stop this lifestyle. I'm not having any fun anymore.

I really need to try to meet other people who know what I'm going through. This is so difficult for me to do and I don't want to be on my own.

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Tue Mar 17, 2009 7:17 am
by Forevergrowing
Hey Sweetpea,
Hope your first meeting went well. I remember mine, not too long ago. I was scared, nervous and I didn't know anyone. I was approached by alot of people that night, welcoming me and giving me phone numbers. I wasn't sure what to do with them and how to act. Couldn't understand why these complete strangers were so eager to be my friends... wondered what they wanted from me. I was reluctant but I gave my number anyway to a couple of these girls who asked for it. That was 15 months ago and I have not been alone since. I have not had the need to pick up a drink since either. I also was not a person who had to drink everyday, but like yourself when I did, I didn't know when I was going to stop. I am glad you're here, took me longer to get here than it did you, and I went on for years destroying all the things, relationships, jobs, homes, friends etc that I worked really hard to build. The power of acoholism is incredibly destructful whether we drink everyday or not. I came into the rooms at 42 years old, single, no children, no life.... just an existence. The rooms of AA, the fellowship, the program, a sponsor, diving into the 12 steps, and continuing to come back changed my life dramatically! There is HOPE.... trust those who want to help you.... those girls who were strangers in the beginning are some of my best friends today. The fellowship turns into your family, and we laugh, have fun and love each other unconditionally. Today I am the girl who approaches that 'new' person and it is an amazing thing to watch the fear leave their eyes and be replaced with confidence and love. I am by no means trying to sell you AA... would serve me no purpose. I just want to share with you the incredible differance it made it my life. Thanks for listening.... Keep coming back, it truly does work if you work it!!

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Tue Mar 17, 2009 4:42 pm
by milkpaint
Hi -

I hope your meeting went well. You are very brave to follow your instincts, and mature to listen to your concerns even when your friends don't see a problem.

I know it is easy to talk yourself into thinking this is not such a big problem - I am pretty new to this too. The thing I hold onto is that this disease only progresses. Life is too valuable to waste with hangovers, self loathing, selfishness. The program is helping me find my way back to the person I can be. I wish you a lot of luck and you are not alone!

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Tue Mar 24, 2009 12:41 am
by wchippie1
Hi sweet pea.

I am in the same exact boat as you. I don't drink everyday but when I do drink I can't stop and end up doing something stupid. You are actually my first post in here. I was told about st paddies day and how I acted and I can't believe it was me! I am 29 and I have no kids but all my friends do is go out everyday ending in Y and I can't do this on my own either. I feel scared, lost, alone and terrified. I don't know if I can do this but I know I am going to need help. I am going to have to leave my previous life behind and move on to a new one.

I really hope we can talk. Perhaps I can come to a meeting with you. My last drink was a week ago and I don't want to ever drink again. I scared myself really really bad and I just want some friends that I can lean on.


Love,

wchippie1

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 14, 2009 9:51 am
by rosesrsu
I haven't gone yet. I am nervous too. I just poured my bottles of wind and liquor down the sink. I am afraid I am going to be judged and people will look at me differently. I hate feeling so insecure, but I am going to be 49 in September and I wish I had done this 30 years ago. I am not going to spend the next 30 years drunk, but I need someone to hold my hand through this.

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Wed Jun 17, 2009 9:55 pm
by director22
I haven't gone yet either. I am a 52 year old woman with education and a good job. I am not one to open up about myself, only to a few people. But I need help. In fact I want to be honest and write more about myself but am afraid that people would recognize my information. I don't want to embarras my family, but I have gone from being respected and admired as a mom to being ashamed and humilitated. Even though I am hesitant to share my problem, that is exactly what I need to do since I don't have anyone to talk to. Perhaps a private messager would be easier. I have even thought about going to a hypnotist to reshape my thought patterns, which is what seems to get me into trouble.

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Thu Jun 18, 2009 9:47 pm
by LAINDIA2172aol.com
HEY HOPE YOU DID OK, AT YOUR FIRST MEETING. I JUST GOT HOME FROM A REHAB PLACE IN CONNECTICUT. I DIDNT REALIZE I HAD A PROBLEM UNTIL MAY 2 I GOT SO DRUNK THAT I JUMPED OUT OF A CAR, I WANTED TO KILL MYSELF. I THANK GOD FOR GIVING ME ANOTHER CHANCE AT LIFE.

Re: Can't do this alone...

Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 11:44 am
by emptyinside
Been thinking of joining for a while now. But, I'm scared. Not sure how to live without alcohol. I can stop drinking but only for a while and when I start again I can control my amount but only for... you know. Lately if I drink I don't stop till the wine bottle is empty. I do not understand my self destruction. I have a wonderful family, good job... I think my problem is I don't feel safe/secure. My mother shattered our family and since then I have been stuggling with alcohol. Suggestions?