Sobriety Online

How does one handle a loved ones denial that they are drinking and losing weight and are gonna die? What logic can you use to counter their blindness to their plight? Has anyone 'cracked the code' how to talk the talk and get them to volunteer to go to rehab?

Thanks to all for any help!

Unfortunately there's no code to crack. The alcoholic has to admit that he/she has a problem. And even if they admit they have a problem, that doesn't necessarily mean they will go to rehab. There's no logic. Don't waste your time with the nagging, the crying, the yelling. It won't work. Take care of yourself. That's pretty much the only you can do. Sad but true.

Find an Al Anon group and start working thru the steps for yourself...Addiction affects everyone

how do i come to terms with the guilt i feel, for wanting to escape from this madness?

It's madness - you said it yourself. Wanting to escape is a very legit feeling!!! Don't blame yourself for your feelings. Go to al anon.

The most successful approach has always been one alcoholic talking to another, the least successful is probably a spouse or authority figure. If you feel you need to get out of a destructive situation, by all means, do it. Al-Anon can be a life-saver, there's a lot of experience with this in Al-Anon rooms.

If it sounds like there's just no tangible tool, or help in these responses, in a way you're right. An alcoholic's denial is the 'insanity' part of this disease, and it's impossible to control or manage. If you haven't yet, pick up a copy of the Big Book as we call it (Alcoholics Anonymous) and check out the chapter called The Doctor's Opinion. It may bring more understanding...

In closing, 98% of all alcoholics and drug addicts have families, and a lot of those find peace and sanity in the rooms of Al-Anon. If you go to one, I promise you won't feel alone there.