burning bridges

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burning bridges

Unread postby harmony1 » Thu May 21, 2009 12:18 pm

I have been sober for almost two whole days.I feel like I am dying, I didn't excpect to feel this crazy bad. I have quit before and never has it been this terrible, not from alcohol ,I have gone through this from hard drugs,but never alcohol. Usually I am a little anxious and crave sugar, I also usually have pot. Cold turkey. I woke up last night at 3am after two hours sleep sweating and didn't fall back asleep until 9am. Needless to say my husband( actually we are divorced, on again off again for five years, insane) is over me. we have a 16 year old so we try to make it work for her. He doesn't want to live with me he can't get over finding me dead on the floor last year,overdose, suicide attempt, would have worked but he came over to check on me after i was mia for two days. I am a mess, no job, no money, no family. He was my last life raft. I don't want to live with him either, but I love my daughter, she the only good thing I've done. I can't take her with me. i am not stable i know this,nor do i have a dime to my name. So here I sit feeling sick,tired, sore, fatigued,depressed. There is nothing i can do but go through it. I would drink, but alcohol doesn't work anymore,plus there's not enough alcohol in the world to fix me. I am scared and feel crazy irrational, i can't make sense.
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Re: burning bridges

Unread postby rocketdog » Sun May 24, 2009 10:04 am

harmony,
we seem to have some things in common, i am struggling with the realization that i am an alcoholic and for the last 2 days have not had a drink, probably for the first time in 5 to 6 years, i have a 17 yr old daughter, a husband who views me as a piece of furniture at best, but you must hang in there, I don't know how old you are, I suspect you are a lot younger than I am, I'm 56, and just these last 2 days have given me hope, it's never too late. I am going to my first meeting next Wednesday, am extremely nervous but hopeful, you must not give up, either for yourself or your daughter.
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Re: burning bridges

Unread postby harmony1 » Mon May 25, 2009 7:23 pm

Thank you for your reply. I don't know what to do with myself when I am sober.It is nice to hear i am not alone thank you
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Re: burning bridges

Unread postby want to help hope I can » Thu May 13, 2010 6:20 pm

I cannot relate to being an alcoholic but I can help you with some great ideas of what to do when you are sober!
I have a son with 5 children and a daughter who will turn 17 next tuesday! I love my children more than anything! I am so proud of you for taking the step to sobriety! If you just spend 5 minutes a day trying to do something nice for someone! Make that someone be you! Be kind to your self. Go for a walk and ask your daughter to go with you! I will keep giving you ideas and know that this is a hard road it will take time and you can do it!
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