Diverting Attention... How's it done?
Posted: Tue Dec 09, 2008 6:32 pm
Hi-
I'm a previous drug user. I used them fir~stly to escape what i was feeling.. which was pain transforming into thoughts I never knew I had about myself and some things that went on. Pain turned to anger.. which turned to sadness.. which turned to depression.. which turned to solitude. Theills and what not made me forget it all.. and I thought they made me feel "better"... about.. me, anyway.
Anyway, I've been to a couple o AA meetings here in my hometown, and I'm taking the suboxone like I am suppose to.. and I honestly feel physically good. No more aches and pains and sweats and shivers from withdraw and all those bad things that happen to your body.. and I feel better about myself in the sense that... well, I'm proud of myself and I have dignity, and feel good about what i'm doing with myself, and all that pride.
But.. but.. but...... If i feel these good things, and the pain is so little it doesn't poison my emotions and feelings.... Why For The Love Of God-Do I Still Want To Get High??????? Nothing good came from the drugs.. and all around - i generallyfeel good, naturally! What is this???!!??? I don't feel okay talking with my doctor, because I don't want to be weak right now... I found this site, and maybe some of you out there have some light to shed, or maybe a story to tell?
I dream of getting high, I think about it alot during the day while I'm working and all, I've even swallowed a few pills a month ago.. I gave in to the temptation.. but I only got sick cause of the suboxone.
Everyone - if you have a thought, or an idea, or (like I said) a story... I like to read, I like to share and i like to write, so anything you have for me is better then what I have. I am very logical, so if you have something inspirational.. I will think about it for hours I'll bet. Thank you friends!!
~JenniesTears~
I'm a previous drug user. I used them fir~stly to escape what i was feeling.. which was pain transforming into thoughts I never knew I had about myself and some things that went on. Pain turned to anger.. which turned to sadness.. which turned to depression.. which turned to solitude. Theills and what not made me forget it all.. and I thought they made me feel "better"... about.. me, anyway.
Anyway, I've been to a couple o AA meetings here in my hometown, and I'm taking the suboxone like I am suppose to.. and I honestly feel physically good. No more aches and pains and sweats and shivers from withdraw and all those bad things that happen to your body.. and I feel better about myself in the sense that... well, I'm proud of myself and I have dignity, and feel good about what i'm doing with myself, and all that pride.
But.. but.. but...... If i feel these good things, and the pain is so little it doesn't poison my emotions and feelings.... Why For The Love Of God-Do I Still Want To Get High??????? Nothing good came from the drugs.. and all around - i generallyfeel good, naturally! What is this???!!??? I don't feel okay talking with my doctor, because I don't want to be weak right now... I found this site, and maybe some of you out there have some light to shed, or maybe a story to tell?
I dream of getting high, I think about it alot during the day while I'm working and all, I've even swallowed a few pills a month ago.. I gave in to the temptation.. but I only got sick cause of the suboxone.
Everyone - if you have a thought, or an idea, or (like I said) a story... I like to read, I like to share and i like to write, so anything you have for me is better then what I have. I am very logical, so if you have something inspirational.. I will think about it for hours I'll bet. Thank you friends!!
~JenniesTears~