Sobriety Online

my name is wade and i am new to this so here it goes. i am addicted to crack and i was clean for a 4 months then i watched my grandfather pass away, and
now i just relapsed last saturday, i had way to much but it made the depression go away. i dont kno how to stop but i am afraid if i dot i will lose my family and friends, this happened 3 years ago and i lost my fiace'. i just need someone to talk to that understands what i am going threw but i never had a sponsor or never been in rehab and i've been to a meeting but they are wierd. can someone help me?

You've come to the right place, man, but it's not enough. Try to find a meeting where you feel comfortable. They are still one of the best ways to get help for cheap. And get a sponsor. Relapsing is not the end of the world - it happens to everybody. What's important is to stop using right away and get help!!! You were clean for 4 months, you can do it. Come back and share with us.