Starting my one month sober journey tonight
Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2014 10:33 pm
I've had it with this. I am officially calling my drinking and substance abuse out of control. Last night I took in a large amount of pot along with chugging a bunch of beers. This is the fourth straight night that I allowed myself to get drunk/high and needless to say I feel like crap. Slowly I see myself sinking a little bit lower. I broke my hand in November when I drunkenly punched a wall. THAT should have been my wake up call. Instead I got a prescription for Percocet and began enjoying the effects of opiates combined with alcohol. Luckily my supply is limited and it isn't a consistent thing. I do occasionally get Vicodin from a friend. This needs to be typed and posted somewhere so I can see the track I am headed on if I don't stop now. I went from being a weekend binge drinker to drinking, smoking, and taking pills whenever I have a night off. Pathetic. This is affecting all aspects of my life. I just wasted 3 beautiful days feeling like a wreck. My house is atrocious, body is on the decline and career is at a halt. My life has become a roundabout of work, stress, and alcohol/drugs.
I'm going to try to abstain from all of it until June 1st. I'd like to say permanently but I need to start with a date. I'm going to combat my urges to drink and anxiety with exercise and focusing on self-improvement. I am begging my future self to stick with this. Please, all I ask is for 37 days of sobriety. This pathetic life I'm currently living has to stop. Now is the time.
I'm going to try to abstain from all of it until June 1st. I'd like to say permanently but I need to start with a date. I'm going to combat my urges to drink and anxiety with exercise and focusing on self-improvement. I am begging my future self to stick with this. Please, all I ask is for 37 days of sobriety. This pathetic life I'm currently living has to stop. Now is the time.