Fighting for my life
Posted: Wed May 28, 2008 5:41 pm
Hi I am new to this site but not new to alcohol. Finally had to admit that I have a problem and the way that my family found out was embarrassing to say the least. I am a 31y.o. health care professional although my behavior while drinking could have actually ended my career. I was arrested and charged with battery on a police officer and while I was in jail (which really seemed like prison) for 2 days my family found out. The worst part about it is that I don't remember a thing about the incident that led to my arrest. This was not the first time that I found myself in a bad situation because of alcohol, but this was the worse. I stand to lose everything because that charge is a felony but in some strange way I think that something this traumatic was what I needed to wake myself up. I have been slowly killing myself for years others have seen it and I have lost some friends because of it. But hearing my mother cry and the disappointment that my whole family has for me now is devastating. In addition to possibly never being able to practice medicine again I feel so stupid but I know that I need help and that I can't do this all alone. I am going to my first meeting tomorrow which I am happy about because I actually decided to do that for myself. I was advised several years ago to go but I never did. I am still drinking although not alone b/c that is when I really seem to lose control. I know that the ideal thing especially now would be to stop all together but I am not that strong yet.