by abclimo » Wed Sep 14, 2011 10:00 pm
Vaidella55: Hi and welcome back. Unfortunately, we are addicts, which means we sometimes get a little self-assured and quit going to meetings and think we can drink and just use a drug occasionally. Unfortunately, we also know this is not true. We cannot control our addictions unless we stop using totally (drugs and alcohol). I know it feels like you will die, but you'll get through this, you'll feel miserable though for a little bit. You know that meetings work for you, so definitely start going to meetings again, go to one a day, if you need to. You know that by collecting phone numbers and creating a network of contact people you can stay clean, you can call them BEFORE you pick up a drink or drugs again. I'm a big fan of journaling, and it's cheap therapy. Journal how you are feeling and what you are thinking when you have the urges to use. It's interesting how sometimes I don't even realize what is bothering me until it comes out through the pen and ends up on paper. You had 4 years clean, so you know how to do this. Definitely work your recovery, there's a huge difference between being clean and sober and recovering. Take it one day at a time, and enjoy your road back to being clean and sober.