It's really not about 'them', you know. I mean: I fall into the same thing, especially if stressed, where other people annoy me more then usual... And it's true that what disturbs me about other's behavior in AA is often what I don't want to admit about myself, behaviors I have been 'guilty' of...
Bottom line is, I am powerless over others. And if I am disturbed by someone else's behavior, then something is wrong with me (after all, I am disturbed). The 'something' wrong with me is usually that I am unwilling to accept that people either aren't doing it the way I think they should, or growing slower then I think they should. Either way, I need to adjust my expectations...
Alcoholics, by definition, have some serious problems with honesty. And I don't just mean cash-register honesty, but honesty about their feelings, fears, and being able to see how 'the dots connect' (behaviors/honesty/fear/4th-step). I tend to let them have their 3 to 5 minutes, knowing (hoping?) that layers will peel away at different times of their life and they get more in touch with honesty.
I still think any active alcoholic is, generally, constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves, I was... And it's only by getting a sponsor who had worked the steps, and sitting down with him and doing the steps that I was able to really chisel away at that...
That being said, I've found some meetings with good people/sobriety in them and go regularly (religiously - heh!), and the ones that don't have much honesty, I don't