When you think about giving up, just look at your little girl. What if something happened to you because of your drinking? How would your daughter handle it? I see that you are a single mother. I can relate to you, but in a different way. I want to share my story with you. My mother was a single mother to myself and my sister. I never got to meet my father. I do know that he was an alcoholic, as well as my mother. My mother was killed in a car wreck when she was 44 years old. My father died a year later due to kidney and liver failure caused by years of drinking. He was 47 years old. So therefore, by the time I was 21, I had lost both of my parents. I stepped up and took full custody of my sister who was 13 at the time. Although I had been raised around alcoholics, I have always been against drinking alcohol. But I done something that most people do, they follow the cycle in which they have been raised. At the age of 15 I met the love of my life. We got married 2 years later and have 2 beautiful daughters. They are 13 and 19. My husband and I were married for almost 20 years. He was an alcoholic when I met him. Of course, I thought he would grow out of it and/or change. His drinking only got worse. He started abusing me physically, mentally and emotionally. He pulled guns on me multiple times, threatening to kill me if I ever left him. I felt selfish to leave him because of our daughters. The one thing he was was a great father. He never abused our daughters or I would have had him arrested. Everytime he started drinking I would hide the car keys so that he could not drive for in fear of him killing himself or someone else. It was like clock work when I did this that I would end up with a black eye. At the time it was worth keeping everyone else on the road safe and keeping our daughters father alive. Finally in January of 2009 I was at my breaking point with him. I had our daughters go to one of my friends house knowing that when he came home I was going to tell him that I was done and for him to leave. When he came home I did just that. He was furious. He tried to strangle me and chased me with a gun. Our daughters and I went into hiding for awhile. You might be asking yourself why I am telling you my story when you posted the hard times you have gone through. I will now tell you......... On August the 10th of 2009 @ 2:11 a.m I heard a knock at my door. My daughters and I were in bed (of coarse). While trying to wake up, I went to the door and when I opened the door, there stood a State Trooper. I almost collapsed as I knew in my heart what he was there to tell me. And I was right. My husband was dinking and driving. He had 2 passengers with him. My husband was driving over 100 miles an hour when he wrecked. Not only was he killed, but one of the passengers were also killed. Once the State Trooper left I was trying to pull myself together and try to prepare myself to explain to our daughters that they had just lost their father. It was and still is the hardest thing I have had to ever do. It seems like I had told him not to drink and drive, because it was a selfish thing to do, because we had 2 daughters and he needed to think about them more rather that himself. He has missed so much in the short time he has been gone. I loved him and still love him. I did not like the things he done, but he was the love of my life and a great dad to our daughters. Now I am a single mother to our 2 daughters. I hope you will find some way within yourself to think about your daughter before you take that next drink. Feel free to reply. I am here for you to talk to.
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