by DJacobs55 » Fri Nov 29, 2013 4:26 pm
Like everyone on here, didnt think I had a problem until my alcohol use came up and bit my ass off. I'm 32 and unfortunately, recently, received 2 DUI's in the span of 2 months. These are my first arrests of any kind (alcohol or not), and realized that I indeed have a problem with binge drinking. Due to my recent circumstances, my family has been urging me to quit all-together, and up until the last week or so, I've been fighting them on this as I rationalized that my DUI's were the result of bad luck. I mean anyone can get them, or so I told myself. Yesterday at Thanksgiving I finally realized that, on my own, I have an inability to control my drinking. I went to my GF's family's house with the full intention of having only a small amount of alcohol. Her family are pretty big drinkers. I indulged in everything from wine to beer to hard liquor, and feel absolutely terrible today. The hangover aside, I feel guilt and shame due to alcohol's depressing effects, and my inability to reduce my intake even once. Nothing bad or embarrassing happened, or so I believe, and it was actually a damn fun night. But I know that its time for me to put the plug in the jug once and for all. I do not drink everyday, or have an urge to drink everyday, but that makes my problem no less serious than someone who consumes everyday. My legal troubles have certainly given me perspective on everything positive I have in my life because I feel that I am so close to potentially losing it all because I couldnt stop drinking. Alcohol has simply become too important in my life, and things have started to suffer as a result. I have a successful career, great family, and great circle of friends, and need to act now before I'm a 40 yr old with no license, no job, and taking court required alcohol classes with 21 yr olds because booze was too important for me. I know this was kind of a rant, but writing about helps me realize it more fully. It's easy for me to say that I want to quit drinking right now when I feel like hell with the day-after depression and anxiety, but I'm worried about when I feel better after a workout and a few days of not drinking. I need to try to remember exactly how I feel right now, and not go back to my old ways once by body has snapped out of it's current alcohol induced funk. Everyone has their own story so please feel free to share your moment if you're like me and want to get it out there to start the process. I've never been to any type of addiction group or seen a professional, so this is very new to me. I feel a little better just hopping on here as I feel this is my first step in getting my life back on track. Now, have to have a talk with my GF, let her know my thoughts and enlist her help. Good luck to everyone else out there, and I wish nothing but the best of luck in your own personal battle. Happy Holidays!