I really need all the suggestions and advice possible

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I really need all the suggestions and advice possible

Unread postby bevie_ann » Thu Oct 16, 2014 11:50 am

I just joined this site minutes ago in desparation. My name is Bevie I'm 22 and my partner is a heroin addict.
This post is going to be all over the place I'm sorry but I'd like to hear TRUE success stories an tips on how to cope, I've never felt pain quite like this before.
I found out 8 days ago, I went through her phone for the first time in our relationship and saw the conversation with her dealer. I instantly began vomiting and its been hell from there. She hid it so well! She told me everyday how she wouldn't go back to it because she knew I would leave abd she knew she would lose everything, while she was on heroin! I promised myself I'd leave if she went back to it but I can't. I can't do it. It's been 10 days since she's used. I watch her take her suboxone everyday and I bought very expensive at home drug tests for my own sanity purposes. When I found out I said SUCH mean things. Things I'd never think I'd ever say to her. Good God I didn't think I was capable of saying such awful things to her.
When I first met her she was beautiful in every single way a person could be beautiful, she was amazing, EVERYTHING I've ever wanted. She told me she used to be an addict, but she had been clean as a whistle for 2 years. That was the first of many many lies that I believed.
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Re: I really need all the suggestions and advice possible

Unread postby pauliem » Sun Apr 24, 2016 6:05 pm

Wow what a ton of bricks to fall on you, I am Paul by the way. So you life partners rather than just friends? That makes a huge difference. Try Yoga, or faith or thoughtless meditation its sounds like bull I know, but calming yourself is saving what you have. If You have sobriety you have much more than most. Its a very complicated and lifelong issue of why people can not leave drugs and drinking alone, yet some can. You can not live an ice cold emotional life. I am hoping the same for all us whether we be addicted or the affected. Getting to a higher consciousness or though plane makes more sense to me now than ever. So how does that help the other person? I am not sure we can, but through our prayers or thoughts or meditations we might just find a path for others to follow, if they wish. That natural high, I can assure, is there. Is it better than heroin, of course not, but its just as comforting and its free and not dangerous. For 40 yrs its been my drug of choice and I was one ...... up dude. Be Strong and try to get to that praceful place.
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Re: I really need all the suggestions and advice possible

Unread postby Guest » Thu May 05, 2016 7:55 pm

How's it going? Is your partner still Clean? I'm beginning to think this tunnel has very little light.
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