I am lost

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I am lost

Unread postby doggonepurrfect4u » Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:01 pm

Hello. i am new to this site. i, myself don't drink, but my boyfriend of 1 year does. he doesn't drink daily, but when he drinks, he makes very poor choices. he has cheated once that i know of while under the influence. we worked through that. he didn't drink for 2 months. now since the holidays he is drinking again. he is a prominant business man and a local college professor, so he is embarassed to seek help. his worst feel is that someone will find out. i have tried looking for meetings for him to attend, but he seems to blow me off. i love him dearly, but refuse to be with an alcoholic that won't seek help. between us we have 5 children. that's make it even more important. in my honest opinion...he doesn't think he has a problem. after he screws up, he does. what do i do? where can i start? being a non-drinker i am not to familiar with alcohol. :(
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Re: I am lost

Unread postby Jason » Sun Jan 13, 2008 2:33 am

he needs to admit to himself that he has a problem. until then, until he faces the truth...chances of him living a sober life are slight. sorry, good luck. to both
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Re: I am lost

Unread postby Jason » Sun Jan 13, 2008 2:37 am

if and when he does seem ready to live a sober life, and admit his problem...he should seek out AA meetings, at least one a day, and get a sponsor(someone that he meets at the meetings that can guide him thru the 12 steps).
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Re: I am lost

Unread postby Radiant1 » Sun Jan 13, 2008 9:53 am

He has to want to seek help for himself. In the meantime, you could greatly benefit form going to Alanon, which helps me to keep the focus on myself in the face of someone else's addiction.
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Re: I am lost

Unread postby Wolf Song » Wed Jan 16, 2008 9:56 pm

Rather than trying to help him all by yourself, perhaps you could suggest he get hold of some fellowship literature and let him discover what he can do about his problem?
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Re: I am lost

Unread postby reginaregina » Sun Mar 13, 2011 11:25 am

Hello, I am new to this and am nervous about all of this. My daughter is involved with a person who drinks and smokes pot. He begs her to buy for him.
This is her first boyfriend. I have not been patient with her and him. She has pulled away from me at times. I want the best for her. I love her.
This is believe it or not her first boyfriend. She is 21 years old. She is a very talented musician and is getting a music degree from a very prestigous college.
She does everything for him and seems to have alienated her family. She only seems happy when with him.
She says negative things like she never wants children due to the fact that she might screw them up. I am worried about her to the extent that it hurts
the rest of my family. Is there help for me in all of this?
reginaregina
 


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