someone please read this im 16 and i need alot of help

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Re: someone please read this im 16 and i need alot of help

Unread postby Weeno » Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:42 am

I feel your pain, I've been an addict/alcoholic my entire life. It started with just taking regular Tylenol to kill emotional pain from mental, physical and sexual abuse when I was 14yrs old... Tylenol doesn't kill emotional pain but I was confused by the abuse, my parents blamed me and I didn't know where to turn. Then one day I found my mom's Xanax and let's say.... that was the beginning to the doorway to hell. I'm 39 now, 12 years in recovery and it started with one drug... then another one stronger, then another stronger and then came the weed and then later the alcohol. I told myself the same thing... it's just weed. I said I needed it to sleep, to keep my calm, to take away my depression... then, thanks to a great counselor in an outpatient program, I learned weed CAUSES depression. I grew tired of feeling like I was trapped... after a long time I finally listened and when I stopped the weed, the depression went away. Not magically of course... it took a month or so after ALL drugs were out of my system to start feeling normal but stopping the drug is just the beginning. As everyone as said in these posts, addiction is a disease. If you don't seek the cause, the reasons why you pick up, if you don't let your feelings out, eventually the addiction wins. I lost everything... drugs/alcohol became more important than the air I breathed. I was homeless and it took a weird turn of events to finally seek help. But through 12 years of recovery I have learned you need to work on yourself and be honest with yourself. If something hurts, talk about it.... if your pissed off, talk about it.... but don't want to do something and end up not doing anything because your life is so very important. I'm grateful for mine... like I said, I grew up a with great deal of emotional crap from my family and I never realized how much it affected me until I got into recovery. I thank God because had I not done something to help myself I would not be here today to give you a piece of the hope I found. AA/NA meetings are a part of my life and I have met amazing, amazing people through AA/NA. Good luck and please for the sake of yourself... you can do this... once the drugs are completely out of your system you will feel normal again... take care.
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Re: someone please read this im 16 and i need alot of help

Unread postby cosmogirl » Fri Apr 03, 2009 4:53 am

oh my god!
ive been depressed and had all sorts of awkward feelings and symptoms FAR BEFORE EVER trying any kind of drugs. insomnia..ive been suffering from that SOB my whole life even when i was a little girl i was always in a high stress and abusive environment and neglected. i used drugs as a way to have fun and temporary feel good and happy and just be so high or loaded that i dont give a f*ck what messed up shit people do to me cause im so high and feeling so good in my own world that nothing else matters. recently..took a turn for the worse.........started getting back into it but this time heavier than EVER why or HOW am i even alive i dont know its a miracle. my parents found my weed pipe and seeds and pookie and set me up to go to rehab and live there for 2 months whether i like it or not..but the thing is..IVE BEEN DYING TO GO! I was just too scared to fess up and tell them the truth cause theyre already hard on me as it is i didnt want to make it worse i wanted to wait til i was 18..but they busted me and got me a 2 month leave from school so i wont get kicked out! what i weight off my shoulders all i wanted to do was wait til i graduate beauty school then go cause i didnt want to get kicked out and i also would be 18 so i wouldnt have them involved cause all they do is drive me nuts. i know that i need help..and I KNOW THAT THEY NEED HELP....ALOT OF HELP! theyre not normal people at all...i may not seem normal to society but shit im not a complete moron matter of fact im VERY SMART AND WISE despite my f*ck ups. THEY HAVE NO DAMN CLUE HOW TO FUNCTION OR COMMUNICATE OR INTERACT WITH OTHER PEOPLE the list goes on and on! but screw them its not about them its about me and im going to do this for MYSELF for once in my life im going to be SELFISH and not in a bad way..its what i need to do if i want to LIVE.
=]






so
im leaving tomorrow morning im going to live there for 2 months and im so excited its going to be an ADVENTURE. woo hoo wish me luck.
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Re: someone please read this im 16 and i need alot of help

Unread postby guest » Wed May 06, 2009 10:46 pm

good luck!! stay clean!! its a long road sweetie but you can do it as long as you want to.
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